Silly human anatomy

Several days ago, I unhinged my jaw in order to eat a piece of food that was too large to fit in my mouth in the normal fashion. When I rehinged my jaw, it hurt! The left side of my jaw has been hurting since then.

Now, I know you’re going to say, “Nelson, you idiot, why did you unhinge your jaw? You’re not a snake. That’s what knives are for… if you can’t fit a piece of food in your mouth, use your opposable thumbs and your tools and chop it up into bite-size pieces.” However, you’re missing something… I unhinged my jaw many times when I was a child to eat large pieces of food, and it never hurt before! I guess I’m just getting old and inflexible.

8 thoughts on “Silly human anatomy

  1. How come I never knew this when I was at Swat and could witness you doing this?

    (This is the best post ever, because it’s so deadpan seriously written, yet so funny).

    • Well, I wasn’t trying to swallow the food *whole*, I believe it was actually a large square chunk of watermelon which I wanted to take a bite out of, but there was no convenient way to do this without hyperextending my jaw. The bite worked, but the jaw now isn’t working quite as well.

  2. What I learned at work today, which seems somewhat relevant:

    If you have scurvy, try using knives to trim your swollen gum and rub the wounds with urine, as Vasco da Gama did in 1487.

  3. I found this page when trying to search for “livejournal mac itunes tags” to try to find a client that does the obvious.

    Wondering: any chance of a photo of you with your unhinged jaw?

    • No, and I don’t plan on doing it again anytime soon considering that it hurt me last time I did it.

      Also, I’m not sure if I literally unhinged my jaw… but I definitely did something funny with my jaw to make it open wider than it is supposed to.

  4. just how big can your mouth become, in inches? Whats the Largest thing you ever swallowed?

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